Dear Auntie, Why am I ugly?
Thanks for writing in. The matter-of-fact way you wrote your question leads me to think you really believe this.
Somehow the idea of you being ‘ugly’ has crept into your belief system. How did that happen? A lot of what we believe to be true about ourselves has been influenced in some way by the experiences we have had. Think about that. It’s important to begin to think about this, as beliefs are just opinions. Here are some things you can do to discover the beauty you already have:
- Get Help. Find a counselor by checking with your tribal office, work, or with the school you’re attending. Life is too long to not love yourself. If you don’t, it just creeps in to other parts of your life and there’s just too much to miss.
- Get to Know Yourself! Start spending some quality time with yourself. If it helps, start a list of all the things you like about yourself, or what you think you might like. Don’t worry if the list starts off short, focus on one or two things and think about how you might make that grow. For example, if you say you are ‘nice’, build on that. Take it to the streets, by doing one nice thing a day for someone else. Do that for a month and see how you feel. If you discover some new things about yourself; add that to the list and see how you can make that grow.
- What do you like to do? If there are things you already like to do, really dive into it, deep. If there are things you have always wanted to try; take a chance and do it! This can help to build your self-confidence and help you focus on the positive.
- Show your Gratitude. It may sound silly, but every night before you go to bed; say one thing you are grateful for. It sounds simple, but it can make a tremendous impact on your life. Try not to go to bed every night thinking badly of yourself.
The Road to Self-Discovery: The GOOD NEWS is that you are young. The longer you believe something about yourself, the harder it is to unlearn it. Use this to your advantage.
Start believing you are wonderful, and that the Creator has a special plan for you, because he does. I am a personal believer that you find what you’re looking for. Search for your beauty. Seek out the beautiful every day. It’s all about perception.
Just so you know, you can also check out:
- American Physiological Association’s Psychologist Locator to find someone near you. Ask about their sliding scale services.
- Mental Health America can also help you find someone, along with providing tips for finding someone on the cheap.
Be kind to yourself and I hope you’ll start to let others see all the beauty that’s already within you.
Love, Auntie Manda
